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Sharrin April Fool: Babi na Daya

  • Assalamu Alaikum warahmatullah. Dukan godiya ta tabbata ga Allah SWA mai kowa mai komai, ina godiya da ya bani ikon rubuta wannan littafin mai suna ‘Sharrin April Fool’, wanda nake fata ya zamo wa’azi ga sauran mutane.

    Sadaukarwa

    Na sadaukar da littafin ‘Sharrin April Fool’ ga mahaifiya Amina Musa Argungu.

    Jan Hankali

    Ina fata wannan littafin zai zama darasi ga dukkanin Al'ummah ya kuma kawo gyara.

    ****

    Muhseen ya gama shirin shi tsaf zuwa office, Meenerl sai kallon shi take yadda ta ga kullum sai kyau yake karawa, yayi murmushi ya dan rusuna ya yi kissing cikin ta, "Lov u my baby" Itama yayi kissing din ta yace "Sai na dawo ko Queen".

    Brief case din shi na rike a hannunta bayan da ta mashi addu'a sannan ta mika mashi tana cewa sai ka dawo my king.... Har ya juya sai kuma ya kalle ta yace "Mind you, kar ki yi aikin da zaki wahala, baby na ma ya wahala”.

    Tayi murmushi tace, “An gama yallabai”.

    Bayan fitar shi ta zauna kan doguwar kujera tana shan tea, a zuciyarta addu'a take Allah ya barta da mijinta har abada. Tana son Muhseen so kuma wanda ba zata iya misaltawa ba.

    Haka shima bangaren shi driving yake amma duk ya tuno kalaman ta masu sanyaya mashi rai zai yi murmushi. ‘Anya kuwa akwai wanda ya kai shi sa'ar samun mace ta gari? Yana da matukar wuya kam’.

    Yana zaune cikin office din shi text dinta ya shigo. “Ina son ka, my king. Hope aiki bai ma ka yawa ba! I wish to see u soon”. Ya karanta sannan ya mata reply, “Love you too my Queen. Allah ya yi maki albarka. I'll be back soon”.

    Kamun barin office din shi akalla za a ce sun yi wayar da takai biyar, bayan messages da suke ma junan su.

    Soyayyar Muhseen da Meenerl tsaftatacciyar soyyaya ce wadda sai an dade ba a ko ji labarin irin ta ba. Suna respecting junan su, wannan shine babban abunda ke kara dankon soyayya tsakanin su. Family su Muhseen kowa yana son Meenerl, yarinya ce mai son mutane.  Hakika, Meenerl bata da wani hali da za a zage ta dashi.

    Meenerl ta tashi tana dan zazzagaya gidan, ta shigo babban dakin da suka tanada dan babyn su, ciki na wata hudu kenan ma. Bangon dakin an yi designing da Mickey mouse gefe daya kuma Tom and jerry ne, gadon babies wanda ko ba a gaya maka ba kallo daya zaka yi mashi ka gane cewa an kashe daloli wurin sayen shi, side drawer dinshi da komai gwanin ban sha'awa! Sai manyan pictures din Meenerl da Muhseen da aka sa a dakin.

    Murmushi ta yi cike da farin ciki sannan ta shafa cikin nata. Muhseen ya dauki son duniya ya sa ma babyn nan tun bai zo duniya ba kenan. Tana cikin wnnan tunanin ya rungumota ta baya Ya rada mata a kunne "Me kike tunani, my queen?"

    Ta juyo ta zuba mashi ido sanann ta yi murmushi, “Welcome back, my king!”

    Haka su ka ci gaba da duba dakin, Muhseen na fadin irin rayuwar da yake so suyi tanan gaba tare da baby, ya juyo yana dubin ta ya shafa fuskanta y ace, “zamu rayuwa da babyn mu cikin farin ciki. Meenerl. Zamu ba ‘ya’yanmu tarbiya, zamu so su, they wll be the best kids ever.”

    Tayi murmshi, “They wll, my king.”

    Suka fito dakin a tare zuwa daki suka shiga ta taya shi rage kayan jikin shi sannan ya fada wanka.

    ****

    Yau ta kasance ranar Friday 1st of April 2016, rana ce wadda ta zama ta tarihi a rayuwar Meenerl da Muhseen. Yayi wanka ya shirya kamar kullum yau har mota Meenerl ta rako shi, ya shiga motar sai dai bai kulle ba, “Ina jin kamar kar na tafi.”

    Ta yi murmushi, “Kuma! You have to go kada ka yi late.”

    Yace, “To shikenan, Madam, sai na dawo. Today will be fun, zan dawo da wuri, zan wuni with my wife and baby”.

    Ta kulle mashi motar tana daga mashi hannu har ya bar harabar gida. Ta dawo ciki ta dauki wayarta, karaf idonta ya kai ga date din da ke jikin wayar ta yi murmushi tana cewa, “Wonderful! Yau 1st April, Muhseen will be the 1st fool of dis month”. Ta zauna ta fara tunanin me zata yi mashi.

    Ya isa office yana fitar da files a cikin jaka, takarda fara ta fado, ya dauka ya bude handwriting din Meenerl ne in bold, ta yi zanen shi very funny, kasa ta rubuta ‘Angel I love U’. Yayi dariya ya rufe takardar ya maida side din jakar.

    Yana attending wasu mutane da suka kawo mashi complain kiran Meenerl ya shigo, ya ce su dan yi excusing din shi, ya daga wayar "Hello…” kamun ya karasar ya jiyo shesheka kukan Meenerl. “Muhseen, ka zo, ka zo da sauri ina hospital ciki na ya….” Sai ta sake fashewa da kuka. “Mhuseen, we've lost our baby, cikin ya zube”. Sai ta tsinke wayar.

    “What...Hello...Hello!” Baki daya jikin shi ya dauki rawa, idanun shi sun kade ya fita hayyacin shi.

    A bangaren Meenerl kuwa sister din ta ce Zara ta zo, Meenerl ta dinga dariya tana cewa, "Fool of the month!”

    Zara ta kwace wayan tana cewa, “Kai aunty ba kyau fa April fool din nan, ko a addini” sai ga kiran wayar Muhseen na shigowa ta daga tace, “Yaya Muhseen, calm down, April fool ne”.

    Ya saki wata ajiyar zuciya ya ma zama speechless ya nemi abun fada ya rasa sai ya tsinke wayar. Ya zauna yana neman wace hanya ce zai rama Meenerl ta sa shi zama shocked, kawai ya yi dariya, idea ta zo mashi, ya kira.

    Meenerl na daga wa ta sa loud speaker tana dariya. Muhseen yace, “Na sake ki saki uku”.

    Ta fashe da dariya tana cewa, “You’re too late to make me the Fool of the month ai…”.

    Zara da ta gama tsinkewa sai ‘inallillahi wa ina ilaihi rajiun’ take furtawa.

    Meenerl ta kashe wayar tana cewa, “ke lafiya?”

    Zara tace, "Wallahi Aunty sakin nan da Muhseen ya maki ya saku!”

    Muhseen bai san wainar da ake toyawa ba ya ci gaba da attending din mutanen shi, he is so eager ya gama ya koma ya ga Meenerl din shi.

    Zara ta ci gaba da kallon Meenerl yayin da hawaye ke zuba a fuskanta, ‘daya daga cikin repercussions na koyi da dabi'ar yahudawa kenan, Meenerl. Sakin da Muhseen ya maki addinan ce ya saku’ wannan ita ce kalmar dake yawo a kwakwalwar Meenerl. Ita dariya ma abun ya bata, ta kalli Zara tace, "Kaman ya kenan ban gane ba?”

    Zara tace, “A musulunci ko da wasa ka furta saki matsayin shi na nan da sunan saki!”

    Meenerl tace, “Ke Zara, baki dai fahimci abunda malamin ku yace da kyau ba”.

    Daya daga cikin wadanda Muhseen ke attending bayan da ya gama complain sai ya dubin Muhseen yace "Yallabai kaman naji ka furta saki yanzun nan a matsayin koyi da wasar yahudu?”

    Muhseen ya ajiye pen din hannun shi yana fuskantar mutumin sannan yace, "Kai kuwa Malam ina ruwan ka da shiga tawagar da ba taka ba?”

    Mutumin yace, "Ka yi hakuri yallabai, ban yi da wani nufi ba, Allah ya huci zuciyar ka, amma kana da masaniyar ko da wasa akayi saki ya saku?”

    Muhseen ya yi dariya ya sa hannu Aljihu ya ciro Naira dubu biyar ya mika mashi yace, "Gashi asha ruwa kan hanya na gode!"

    Mutumin ya kalli Muhseen sosai sannan yace, "Ban fada ba dan ina son abun hannunka, amma ka yi nazari sosai akan abunda na gaya maka, ka yi bincike wurin manyan malamai dan tabbatar da abunda ka aikata a yanzu”. Ya mike ya fita ya bar Muhseen cike da mamakin kalaman shi.

    Miye zai faru? Muhseen zai yadda sakin da ya ma Meenerl ya saku?

    Karo na biyu da Zara ta sake share hawayen ta, "Na ga baki dauki zancen nan serious ba amma ina ce nan makotan ku gidan Sheikh Nasser ne?”

    Meenerl ta amsa, “Sosai ma kuwa!”

    Zara ta danna ma Muhseen kira da wayar ta, "Yaya, duk inda kake pls ka zo gida da sauri".

    Da yake Muhseen na ma kan hanya lokacin sai yace, "Ni ba zaku sake fooling dina ba after all am on my way!” Ya kashe wayar.

    A lokacin jikin Meenerl ya soma sanyi, ta dauko hijab din ta ta saka.

    Da sallama ya shigo cikin gidan. Zara ta amsa har lokacin da hawaye a fuskar ta. Da fara'ar shi yake, kai tsaye ya nufi inda Meenerl take ya ja hancin ta, "Yeye, silly Queen, ina zaki haka?”

    Zara tace, “Yaya Muhseen, wallahi zama fa bai same Ku ba, ba aure tsakanin ka da Meenerl”.

    A dan razane ya juyo ya dube ta, “Dan ke kika raba auren?”

    Zara tace, "Yaya ku zo muje Alhamdulillahi kuna da babban malami kusa”.

    Muhseen yace, “Kai ni fa canfin nan naku ba yadda zan yi ba. Kin ga da yunwa na dawo!”

    Zara ta katse shi ta hanyar cewa "Muhseen! Allah ya fada kace canfi!”

    Ya juyo dis tym little serious. Sannan Meenerl tace, "Muhseen, mu je din ina so a cire ma Zara wannan kokwanton nata.”

    Muhseen yace, “To shikenan mu tafi, amma ka ji min Zara da son kashe aure kiri-kiri.”

    Motar shi ya bude suka shiga da yake layin gidan su ne in 2 minutes suka isa. Sun fito Muhseen ke tambayar sojan da ke gadin gidan, “Dan Allah Sheikh fa?”

    Mutumin yace yanzu ya dawo daga wurin jana'iza!”

    Muhseen yace, "Wa iya zu billah! Su ka karasa ciki inda aka masu Iso a falon Sheikh, yana zaune tare da manyan ya'yan shi suna tofa albarkacin bakin su akan wannan mummunar akida ta mutanen mu masu koyi da Nasara.

    Bayan sun gaisa da Muhseen, Muhseen ke tambayar shi abunda ya faru, nan ya shiga yi mashi bayanin wani dan uwan shi ne aka kira akace mai dan shi ne yayi hadarin mota. Very unfortunate mutumin hawan jini gare shi, kan ace miye Jinin shi ya hau. Dama ajali na kusa rai yayi halin shi. Gasi dan ma yanzu haka baya gari an kira ana gaya mai wnnan aika-aika har yanzu bai yarda ba wai shi April fool ne ake mashi. Sheikh ya kare zancen da cewa, “Allah ya shirya mana zuri’ar Muslim baki daya. Wannan wani irin sharrin April fool ne!”

    Muhseen ya dubin Sheikh sannan yace, “Ameen!”

    Sheikh yace, “Me ke tafe daku ne Muhseen?”

    Muhseen yace, “Sheikh, tambaya ce zamu yi!?

    Nan Zara ta shiga gaya ma sheikh tun farkon abunda ya faru kawo zuwa yanzu da suka zo wurin Sheikh.

    “Innalillahi waina ilaihi Raji'un!” Shine abunda Sheikh da dukkanin wadanda ke wurin suke nanatawa. Hawaye ke fita a idon Sheikh yayin da tausayin halin da al'ummar Musulmi suka fada a bakin yanzu yace, “Astagfirullah, Astagfirullahh”

    Ku biyo ni a labarin “Sharrin April Fool”.

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